Ugh, today is a very hard day for your mommy as we have officially come to the end of my maternity leave. After getting to spend the past 14 weeks with you, I sadly have to go back to work on Monday morning. I knew that it would be hard, but I don't think that I ever realized just how hard! It makes me wonder how your dad has been doing it this whole time!
Together we spent the first month of your life at Children's Hospital in Omaha. The hospital was our life. It was all that you had been given the opportunity to know. I sat by your side every day while you were there. When I couldn't hold you, I made due with sitting and staring at you for hours on end. Even when I could hold you, I found myself staring, memorizing ever feature and detail of your face, hands, little feet...I was totally taken aback by how beautiful you were and by the strength that you showed on a daily basis. I would come at 9 AM for rounds and leave around 10 PM after reading you bedtime stories and saying our prayers. Once I got back to Grandma Debbie's house at night, I could hardly wait until I could see you again in the morning!
After 4 long weeks, I got to take you home! Daddy was so excited to have us all under one roof. At home we could finally have a "normal" life. I won't lie, it was exhausting, but we were home. Home where we could hold you whenever we wanted. Home where we could lay with you on the couch and snuggle. Home here we could be a family.
So now its been 10 weeks since we came home. I look back and am so proud and amazed at how far you have come. You have moved beyond the "eat, sleep and poop" phase, and now I get to see that little personality of yours emerging day by day. I think thats what makes it so hard. You are becoming so expressive and observant; changing every single day...and now I have to go back to work!
I can't imagine how hard it is going to be dropping you off at daycare on Monday morning (or that I'll be very productive at work), but I know that you will be in good hands. Silly me, I'm already really excited to pick you up at the end of the day and see that perfect little grin of yours!
I love you Charley Bear. With all my heart.